


Warmth

by MunTiller



Category: Hollow Knight (Video Games)
Genre: Blood, Blood and Injury, Character Death, Childhood Trauma, Depression, Heavy Angst, Human AU, Mental Health Issues, Self-Harm, Self-Worth Issues, The Infection (Hollow Knight), The Radiance is soft, Violent Thoughts, but she's bad at expressing it, no beta we die like men, so like, the radiance really cares, they actually can hug each other and it won't be physically impossible, very short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:20:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24055837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MunTiller/pseuds/MunTiller
Summary: The small vessel she knew, the one who pushed her so insistently towards recovery, tried to take their sibling's place, all to no avail. For the first time in years, the princess broke down.
Relationships: Hornet & The Radiance (Hollow Knight), Hornet (Hollow Knight) & Everyone
Comments: 9
Kudos: 46





	Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> As the tag says, I wrote them as humans here, so keep that in mind. Thank you for reading ^^

It started like a simple wish, a childish ambition; _I wish I knew how to sew better than this._

A loud "bang" echoed through the Ancient Basin, years worth of dust shaking through the stagnant atmosphere. At the station, the stag jumped in sudden desperation. A mortifying scream soon followed and now they were sure it came from the deepest parts of the area.

It then grew to something bigger; _I wish my mother was here to teach me._

The sound echoed again, this time stronger, bolder than ever before. The ruins of the old palace trembled as clouds of dirt started rising and the rubble started to fall over. The stag, for the first time in their entire life, jumped out of the tracks and ran towards the station's entrance, trying desperately to see what was happening.

And bigger; _I wish I could see my family again._

The "bang" this time was at least twice as louder, the corpses ahead falling to the ground with hollow thuds as void that did not belong in them started leaking out through their eyes. The stag flinched as a boulder fell into the pathway, blocking the passage to the rest of the Ancient Basin. That girl was trapped inside now.

Then they started getting worse; _I wish the world was still habitable._

Another bang came, and another, and so on. Each time they got worse and worse until the worst couldn't be imagined anymore. The stag at this point was too scared to try to move the rubble, choosing to jump into the tracks once more and run towards the surface. They knew what was happening, but they wished they didn’t. They had dreaded this day ever since that strange child had showed them their friend.

Until the day the question came, and it never went away; _why did they leave me?_

The rumbling stopped, a sudden peace before the storm that was to occur. Deep down the ancient place, Hornet’s hands were shaking; nail shamelessly broken on the ground, knuckles bleeding heavily and a sprained ankle she couldn’t give a shit about. _Why didn't they take me with them?_ She clenched her fists, _Why could I only be strong enough to save myself, but not the others?_

_Why am I always the one who gets left behind?_

Ever since she was a child, they always dismissed her feelings. She's just tired, she's just hungry, she misses you, she's just a child; well she wasn’t a child anymore so why did everyone keep trying to look out for her? She wanted to help, but she didn't need their pity or kind words, she just-

Her fist came in contact with the sealed passage, the cursed, blood-marked symbol of the King’s Brand burned into the depths of her subconsciousness with such ease it was infuriating. Hornet hit the door again, and again, and again, and again; she didn't stop even as she felt like her bones had suffered severe damage. 

Why, just why? Was she just disposable like that? Did people look at her and think she was just a perfect stone to use and reach a ledge? Ever since she was a young, she knew something was wrong, even if her mother had loved her dearly she knew there was something out of place. She was a bribe, a price to be paid in exchange of something else, like geo, and no one kept the same geo stone on their pockets for years on end. 

Was that why everyone kept stepping over her with no remorse? Was that why they never looked back when she called for them so desperately? Hornet hated this feeling of being abandoned, it made her panic when she was alone and doubt others when she wasn’t, like a lost grub waiting for someone to care enough to help.

_Why do they always leave me? Am I not worthy enough to be loved? Why can't I have something nice for once?_

First, it was her mother, who left her in a poor attempt of sacrifice herself against the infection. Then it was her family that sent her to the hive and never paid a visit after that. Then it was the queen who collapsed to the infection as the hive fell into chaos. Soon after it was her father, too ashamed of his actions to show himself or even care about her. And then it was Hollow; later it was Ghost. 

A painful sensation took over her body as she kept hitting the sealed passage to the abyss. "Come back." She screamed, wondering if there was even anyone inside to listen "Come back!" Tears threatened to fall from her eyes as she felt her bones breaking under her strength, but she held them back; her hands would be forever ruined, but who cared now? She certainly didn't and when everyone always left her behind, why would they care, too?

 _Please come back, don’t leave me here to rot like the others did, please._ Hornet hated how weak she sounded, as if she had suddenly thrown years of progress away against her emotional outbursts; she felt like a child screaming for her mother all over again.

Blood dripped onto the floor and she felt like her head was going to explode. She stopped, hands on the door as she put her weight into it, wishing it would be enough to push it open. Her mind became foggy and she fought the urge to give into the warmth, "It's alright, you can cry", that dreadful voice came into her mind, taking over her thoughts with ease and evident kindness.

For this Hornet hated her, because after years of fighting each other she became familiar, the closest thing to a friend the warrior ever had until she met Ghost, and Quirrel, and the people that lived in Dirtmouth. She would never admit it, but the Radiance _had_ power over her, just not in the way she wanted. 

Hornet, against her own wishes, let the tears fall down.

"Why did you leave me?" Hornet whispered as she leaned against the door, the image almost pitiful had it been less gruesome. Her hands were shaking, painting the walls in red. She didn’t want to acknowledge the goddess any further, she knew it would result in arguing and she didn’t want to talk right now, so she gave her the cold shoulder. The Radiance shivered uncomfortably as she realized she was being ignored, memories of why the infection existed in the first place coming to her.

"Hornet…" The goddess focused on making her body physical for once, putting a hand on the warrior’s shoulder. Hornet refused to look at the blinding light the Radiance displayed, recoiling at the feeling of warmth her hand carried as if it burned – and it did. She hated this, she hated that her enemy was the only one capable of bringing her comfort now, that her enemy was the only one who had _remained_.

"I trusted you, all of you, every single one of you. I was nice, I was welcoming, I did everything I could to help you, but then why did you go?" Her voice was weak, full of dread and disbelief. Hornet shook her head as she felt her legs giving in and she slowly slid down along the door, falling to her knees. Her head fell forward, hitting the surface forcefully with a thud, blurring her thoughts even further. 

Hornet kept silent for a moment, body shaking so much it was visible from afar. After some time, she gave in and curled up against herself, pulling fistfuls of her red cloak, almost giving it a new shade of color with her blood. She whimpered as she rested her head against her knees, her back aching painfully with the wound from her previous battle still open because she couldn't bring herself to stitch it back together.

She was going to die out of blood loss.

Trembling in a cold sweat, she whimpered, the pain suddenly too big to bear in silence. "Why? Please tell me why. How could you take everything away from me? What did I do against you to deserve this?" She finally addressed the blinding light in a whisper, something so far from the cry of a warrior she could have been mistaken by a child.

The goddess couldn't help but look down as she kneeled on the ground, feelings of regret taking over as she, silently, wished she could have done better regarding the warrior. Perhaps if she had taken over sooner, fought more for this body, then the girl wouldn’t have suffered as much.

Presented with silence, Hornet looked up, skin even more pale than her usual. The Radiance grimaced, almost convincingly enough to make the girl feel bad for her, but she knew better than this.

"I'm sorry, dear." The Radiance mumbled, caressing the warrior's back tenderly. Hornet wished she had the strength to recoil, but she could barely breathe anymore. If she was to die now, - because the Radiance knew the girl would never give in to her influence, even if it meant having another day - then the goddess hoped she could at least give her some comfort before she passed. She had people waiting for her on the other side, after all.

The Radiance lifted a hand to touch Hornet's cheek, wiping out the flood of tears that kept coming. She sighed silently, almost ashamed of her actions by this interaction alone; the blood that already tainted her hands now had a new painful layer added to it. "You have been so restless lately; your skin is so pale, why don’t you just take a nap? It’s okay to sleep, little one, you haven't got a wink for the past few weeks. I will wake you up, I promise."

She knew her strategies were dirty, she was aware of how much suffering she had caused to survive, but that never meant she didn’t care about it. For once she decided to try and comfort a victim of hers.

The warrior frowned as she growled against the idea. "I won't fall for your tricks, not until you answer me. Answer me." The Radiance sighed as she noticed how Hornet's voice trembled. Her time was running out much quicker than the goddess had imagined. She closed her eyes briefly, before pulling the girl towards her.

Hornet’s breath hitched as she was suddenly pulled into a hug. She gasped for a second, out of air, before she reunited her remaining energy and started struggling, thrashing forcefully against the firm grasp of the goddess and clawing her white clothes apart in retaliation. "Let go, I don't need your pity!" 

But The Radiance didn't move a muscle. For a moment, it almost felt like the warrior was being held by a statue; unloving, apathetic, _cold_. 

"Let go! Let go, please, let me go. Please…" Hornet's voice faded with time as she felt her energy draining. Her thrashing became weaker, fists grabbing the Radiance’s clothes as she didn’t know what to do anymore. "Please… I don't want to leave… please let me stay…" She eventually whispered as she kept pushing the goddess away, this time too weak to even cause struggle, but there was still no reaction.

The Radiance didn't move, for once she didn't tremble; she ignored every single plea and cry until there were none to hear, until she started hearing shaky, quick breaths. 

“It’s okay to sleep, little one, you can go.” She received nothing but a whimper as a response, feeling the body in her grasp become limp, cold to the touch. She hugged the warrior tenderly, justifying her own actions by imagining Hornet finally getting together with her mother and family; with the vessels that fought so fiercely against her.

“I’ll wake you. You can go, don’t worry.” And for once, Hornet believed it; she had no other choice but to do so. She hated this, she hated this so much.

She closed her eyes for once, the orange tint behind her eyelids less terrifying and more welcoming than ever, almost caring, heartwarming. She felt the hug become tighter, gasping for air for the last time, before a warm feeling suddenly embraced her.

_Mother?_


End file.
